How to Educate a Peace Activist  

Saturday, August 12, 2006

I generaly avoid "discussion board" formatted sites. They're a little rough on my eyes. Every now and then, though, I'll stumble upon something at such a site. Following a link from RWN, I happened upon this discussion board, and before I could avert my eyes, noticed a comment thread entitled, "How to Educate a Peace Activist". Somehow, I still don't think they would get it, but the procedure sure does make the point well.

How to educate a peace activist

With all of this talk of war, many of us will encounter "Peace
Activists" who will try and convince us that we must refrain from
retaliating against the ones who terrorized us all on September 11,
2001, and those who support terror.

These activists may be alone or in a gathering.....most of us
don't know how to react to them. When you come upon one of these people, or
one of their rallies, here are the proper rules of etiquette:

1. Listen politely while this person explains their views. Strike
up a conversation if necessary and look very interested in their ideas.
They will tell you how revenge is immoral, and that by attacking the people
who did this to us, we will only bring on more violence. They will probably
use many arguments, ranging from political to religious to humanitarian.

2. In the middle of their remarks, without any warning, punch them in the nose.

3. When the person gets up off of the ground, they will be very angry and
they may try to hit you, so be careful.

4. Very quickly and calmly remind the person that violence only brings
about more violence and remind them of their stand on this matter.
Tell them if they are really committed to a nonviolent approach to undeserved
attacks, they will turn the other cheek and negotiate a solution. Tell them they must lead by example if they really believe what they are saying.

5. Most of them will think for a moment and then agree that you are correct.

6. As soon as they do that, hit them again. Only this time hit
them much harder. Square in the nose.

7. Repeat steps 25 times until the desired results are obtained and the
idiot realizes how stupid of an argument he/she is making.

8. There is no difference in an individual attacking an
unsuspecting victim or a group of terrorists attacking a nation of people. It is
unacceptable and must be dealt with. Perhaps at a high cost.

We owe our military a huge debt for what they do for
us and our children. We must support them and our leaders at times like
these. We have no choice. We either strike back, VERY HARD, or we will keep
getting hit in the nose.

Lesson over...class dismissed.
I know a few peace activists who could use a punch in the nose anyway. This would definitely serve as good therapy.