How to Handle Creepy Text Messages  

Monday, September 29, 2008

So I get up Saturday morning around lunchtime, and I have two text messages from some strange number...

Sat Sept 27, 9:14am: Morning princess....
Sat Sept 27, 9:20am: Sleeping beauty........
Now, being that I'm a 40-year old short guy who could stand to lose a few pounds and grow some hair, this was obviously pretty creepy.

Of course, me being the asshole I can often be to people like this, I decided to fuck with the poor soul who sent these...
Sat Sept 27, 1:46pm: Will u sleep with me?
Figured I'd play off the "Sleeping Beauty" theme a bit, of course the response came back shortly...
Sat Sept 27, 3:01pm: Sure
Oooooh boy. What an idiot.
Sat Sept 27, 3:08: 2 nite?
I just HAD to see just how desperate this moron was...
Sat Sept 27, 3:09pm: Send a pic
In other words, this whackjob is sending messages along the lines of "princess" and "beauty" to someone he has never even seen! So I send this...
Sat Sept 27, 3:10: Y?
Figured maybe I could get some answers with regard to why someone would need a pic if he knew enough to call me "beauty" hahaha. The response was COMPLETELY unbelievable!
Sat Sept 27, 3:11pm: Trust me
Trust him. Yeah right. At this point it was getting old, so I started reeling him in.
Sat Sept 27, 3:16pm: Y should I trust a total stranger who sends me creepy msgs out of nowhere?
You'd think this would be enough to get his sorry ass to reconsider this "relationship", but nooooooo...
Sat Sept 27, 3:20pm: Your the one askig to sleep with me
Once I got up off the floor, I figured it was time to finish off this pervert...
Sat Sept 27, 3:23pm: Ur the one that called me princess & sleeping beauty. My wife laughed so hard i thought she was going 2 die!
Needless to say, I never heard back.

In the words of Bugs Bunny, WHAT A MAROON!!!

I've been laughing my ass off since then. Hopefully I can get it reattached at some point!